To !HELL! with pastel colored PEEPS! Bring me the Chocolate Bunny! A linked Rant.

Posted: April 5, 2012 in Easter, Easter Candies, Funny, Holidays, Hot, Humor, Jokes, Tachnology, Uncategorized
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Oh, what a sissy thing to love on Easter morning. You all know the topic here. Its Peeps! The shame. The outright ridicule. Eating a Peep. These ridiculously colored, sugar dipped, animal look alikes that are intended to be what? Eaten? It’s a Chickie, or a Bunny… ooooh. Peeps. Don’t make me take a blowtorch to you. You little fluffy, sugar coated, rubbery mystery animal.

Wait, my kids love them. Bullshit! I have to throw that card. Bullshiiiit! Peeps are only good for their utilitarian use”

Seriously? You think that these little bright bastards of candy-land were going to sneak past “THE GODFATHER” of EASTER candy? He IS the Easter bunny! He has family. Why is he called the GODFATHER you ask?Image

  • He is Hollowed, That’s why
  • He shits jellybeans
  • The Easter Bunny Lays EGGS! An AMAZING FEAT!

The Easter bunny’s eggs have delighted both children and adults since the beginning of our known time. The Easter bunny  allowed Ronald Reagan to have his own Jelly Beans on his desk. Ronald Reagan still hunted for Easter eggs; not Peeps. Peeps are nothing but sugary, died, marshmallow Animal Crackers. Animal crackers aren’t cool. The Godfather said so.

So, in light of this little machine made impostor of an Easter Bunny Original, I have my eye on you, peepy McPeepmaster.

  1. […] towns, and cities celebrated Easter once again by hunting for Easter eggs with their children. The Easter bunny has defeated the peeps militia community and won. Although the war was quite epic and commercially backed by sponsors, millions upon millions of […]

  2. […] The very best were the chocolate Easter bunnies. […]

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