Posts Tagged ‘Ipad’

Take One Armadillo, Add Flash Bulb, and Stir!

    Bill, Jim, and Scott were at a convention together and were
    sharing a large suite on the top of a 75 story sky scraper.
    After a long day of meetings they were shocked to hear that the
    elevators in their hotel were broken and they would have to climb
    75 flights of stairs to get to their room.  Bill said to Jim and
    Scott, let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task by
    concentrating on something interesting.  I'll tell jokes for 25
    flights, and Jim can sing songs for 25 flights, and Scott can
    tell sad stories the rest of the way.  At the 26th floor Bill
    stopped telling jokes and Jim began to sing.  At the 51st floor
    Jim stopped singing and Scott began to tell sad stories.  "I will
    tell my saddest story first," he said.  "I left the room key in
    the car!"

He doesn't take to infidelity lightly....

Two men were walking their dogs together. The first guy with a Chocolate lab and the second a Chihuahua

The first guy says, “Hey, you want to get something to eat?”

The second guy replies, “Yeah, but they all have signs that say ‘No Dogs Allowed’.”

The first guy with the lab puts sunglasses on and hands the other guy a pair. “Follow my lead,” he says.

As he walks into the restaurant a waiter stops him and says, “Sir, no dogs allowed.”

The man replies, “It’s O.K., this is my seeing eye dog.” The waiter apologizes and leads the man to a table as the second man enters.

The same waiter stops him but the guy says, “This is my seeing eye dog. I’m with the other guy.”

The waiter replies, “Sir, you can’t fool me, you have a Chihuahua.”

The man freaks out and says, “A Chihuahua? They gave me a Chihuahua?!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I woke up on Sunday of this week and had a song in my head that I heard in a dream that I was having. Now, I know it sounds weird, but it’s also the way that I learned how to play guitar, though that’s hard rock. I grabbed a pen and paper and wrote it down. I’d love for someone to finish it and put it to music. Any Takers? I want to hear it again! It was to the tune of Steve Earle’s “Copperhead Road” but faster with less of a foreboding feel…. Here it is:

Baby We’re Goin’ Out

Turn up the radio it’s

My favorite song

Let down your hair baby

Yeah, Let it hang long

You know why?

Baby we’re goin out!

Well I’ll put on my boots

And my old Blue Jeans

Headin’ to the Honky Tonk

With my little queen

Get your dancin shoes on

And that little red dress

I called the sitter

Don’t you worry ’bout the rest

You know why?

Baby We’re goin out!

I’d love to hear it to music or hear others input on this…. so, No copyright, No claim…

Let’s call it open source songwriting!

to be owned... click for another...